Nothing Less Than Butterflies

Since I have become more open minded this year I have been learning a lot of lessons.

And the truth is Diamonds, everyone is a teacher. Even the most unexpected people have the most valuable lessons to teach you.

I know you are sick of me mentioning this show, but I will (once again) make a reference to Sex and the City. Although each of these ladies are polar opposites of each other they are soul mates, and their mistakes only teach me more about what life is and how to get through it. One by one. episode by episode, season by season, these girls lived their lives in the Big Apple, and I watched and absorbed every ounce of it.

Firstly, Samantha taught me that I never have to apologize for who I am.

Miranda taught me to make exceptions to the people who matter most to you.

Charlotte taught me to never give up on my dreams no matter how many times I fail.

And Miss Carrie Bradshaw taught me to never settle for anything less than butterflies, and to never stop looking for the love I deserve.

Yes, it may seem strange that I learned these lessons from characters on TV, but if you're going to be more open minded in life you have to realize that every person will teach you a lesson, even the fictional ones.

“Some people are settling down,

 some people are settling

 and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies."

-Carrie Bradshaw

2014 Reason to Resolution

Alright Diamonds, time to start all over. I think it's safe to say that we all want to change a little something about ourselves this year, we all has resolutions, and that's what makes New Years fun! It's filled with new chances and opportunities.

Thus I have come up with three very important New Years Resolutions to set myself up for success this year.

1. Blog more: I miss writing everyday and I think this blog will help me get myself back on track.

2. Keep an open mind about everything: I've noticed that everyone has a reason for doing everything, and instead of judging them I should try to understand them.

3. (This ones my favorite) I want to make one person smile everyday. Putting a smile on someones face is possibly the most rewarding thing ever, and I want to make people happy because why not?

Diamonds, don't map out your year step-by-step. Let things take their course, and this year will be great for you, but I do strongly encourage you to pick one thing you would like to improve about yourself and stick with it; maybe you want to be happier, or stronger, or more forgiving. Whatever you decided to do keep a positive attitude, and your year will be fabulous.

All the Small Things

Isn't winter the most magical time of year?

Snow falls, stories by the fire side, warm cup of tea, and lots of blankets.

Winter has always had to power to make me feel like a child again, which is something I've been needing lately. I've forgotten what it's like to be amazed by the little things, to spend quality time with the people you most value, and to watch old Christmas specials again.

They may seem like little things to some people, but they've been the most help for me. I didn't quite know how hard this year was going to be on me, and because of all the pressure I've been put under I need little things like this to keep me grounded.

Maybe you've been under some pressure too, Diamonds, and I hope you find a way to recover from the pressure, or simply avoid it for a few days.

Because generally speaking, life sucks. It's a harsh reality we all face at some point and time, but the little things that make you smile are what keeps you going.

Little things like snowflakes.

You Were There, and Now You're Here, Where Next?

Lately I've realized that I've been living in the past.

I spend too much time worrying about history repeating itself, or I stress over past mistakes that I have no control over now.

Diamonds, you can't live in the past, it's done with and over. Yes, I know you have a million mistakes you wish you could take back, and if you had the chance you would do everything over again from the first grade, but that's not an option.

Turning back isn't an option, and it sucks. With all my heart I wish I could redo the past, especially the past month, but you know whats better than the past?

 The future.

The future holds so many more opportunities. One day you can leave the town you are in now, and you'll meet so many new people who won't judge you on your past because they weren't there for the past.

Stop worrying about the past, and start focusing on the future.

An Open MInd

So maybe my recent attempts to swear off all friendships has become somewhat of a failure.

I thought it would be easiest if I never let anyone get close to me because then I would not have to deal with the pain of letting a close friend become just another face in the hallway, or another name on a grave.

But I have realized that keeping people out is a lot harder than letting people in, and you just have to take the risk of them hurting you.

There will always be people who you can count on, even if you don't want to admit you can.

So Diamonds that's my big lesson for the day, you can't kick everyone out of your life. Yes, you can leave certain people who you don't listen to you or keep your promises, but you have to keep your mind open so that the right people find their way into your life.

National Best Friends Day

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.” 
― Bob Marley

Preach it, Bob Marley.

That's the thing with life, it's unfair. Everyone is going to stab you in the back, everyone is going to lie to you, break your trust, and make you cry.

You are going to meet people who put you in the lowest places, you are going to meet people who will keep you in those low places or push you down even further, but I promise you if you look hard enough there will be people who can bring you out of that dark place.

Those people who take you out of there are the best of friends, whether they stay up all night to text you, sit next to you in a hospital bed, or listen to music with you until you feel better.

Diamonds, I swear to you that your true friend is out there, and to tell you the truth, you might not meet them in high school. You might have to wait a really long time to find someone who will say all of the right things, be there for you, and keep all of your promises.

Until you find them, I suggest family. Stay as close to them as possible, because you will be stuck with them anyways, and they have to help you in your time of need.

But never, ever, settle for anyone who makes you feel less than you are.

Teenage Wasteland.

I'd be lying to you if I told you Junior year wasn't the hardest thing I've ever been through, and I haven't even been in it for two months yet.

It's kind of scary when someone tells you that being a high schooler is the greatest time of your life, and it should be.

We should be able to smile more, but we can't when we have to stay up so late and finish essays, readings, formal labs, and calculus.

Being a teenager is suppose to be fun, I shouldn't have to worry about my future as much as I do now, and I worry a lot, I worry to the point of wondering why I try so hard, and why don't I just give up?

And I know I'm not the only one, because I have plenty of friends who consider dropping their AP classes and just aim for community college.

I wish I had the courage to do that, and sometimes I don't know why I don't.

My goal in life is to just be happy, and right now I'm not.

So why should I spend my "best years" not happy because I have the slightest hope that if I'm unhappy now I'll be better in the future?