Do We Need the Tears?

It's only natural for girls to spend their time in class daydreaming about the most perfect relationship. Meeting Mr. Perfect one warm summer night by the beach across the campfire. You both become extremely close, and then he sweeps you off your feet, and he romances you. You think your life is just as perfect as all of those Nicholas Sparks films.

But what happens when Mr. Perfect isn't Mr. Right?

Is their such a thing as an ideal break-up?

Not the kind where you have to leave, and you go home, and he writes you for a year, and you run into each other three years later and you both never really stopped loving each other.

I am talking about you both walk away without any hard feeling and wish each other the best in life, and just leave. Maybe you could cross paths later, but it would be like seeing an old friend, not a lost love.

To be honest, that's what Derek and I had. I had always felt that we walked away from our relationship wishing only the best for each other, and I feel free to call him up whenever I have a problem, or just need someone to talk to.

But here's the problem.

Now every boy I will ever date will be held to the expectation of perfect Derek.

That may not seem like a problem, because it keeps my expectations high, but think about it this way:


Without the messy gross break up Derek may always be "the one" for me in the back of my mind.

With out the screaming of "I hate you!" and "You're worthless!" Derek will always be perfect, and I know myself well enough to know why I can't deal with that. I can't walk away from something like that, knowing there was a possibility of more.

What I am trying to say is, I guess I would prefer the extremely upsetting break up, in which i spent three days sobbing, and then have one of those nights to get my mind off things, and go out dancing with my friends.

A relationship is hard, but break ups can be even harder if you don't do them right.